Damn Joss. You’re just determined to feed my inferiority complex aintcha? I mean seriously “Avengers” was good, but did you really have to make “Age of Ultron” that damned good? You couldn’t have possibly succumbed to just a li’l bit of sequelitis? Just a skosh? A smidge?

No, you had to go and make a damn near flawless movie didn’t you? You had to take every fucking bit of concern I had about the flick and turn it right on its head didn’t you? You had to turn Cap’s perfect squareness into a running joke that made me laugh every single time didn’t you? You had to take every fanboyish continuity complaint about phase two and make it into an in joke didn’t you? You just had to take damn near every loose thread from any Marvel movie yet released and weave it all together into a glorious gods damned tapestry that makes every pitiful attempt I’ve ever made at fiction into a sad little joke didn’t you? DIDN’T YOU.

Joss, I swear by the gods that I will not rest until I get satisfaction. By which I mean get your pasty ass working on Avengers 3, or I may just have to go all Helter Skelter on you. And I’ve seen you in interviews Joss, you aint exactly no Steve Rodgers. Hell you aint even a Fred Rodgers. Be warned you nearly bald genius, the cost of excellence is the expectation of excellence. And expectations are a more dangerous bitch than Black Widow, the Scarlet Witch, and Ultron combined.

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